Thoughtful Things
The "ME" Generation
June 23, 2011
Me me me me... (taking a breath) me me me me me some more, and me there too.... oh wait what about me?
Sound familiar to you? I think we have all
met someone like that in our lives. Some of us have one or two in our
own families, and some of us may have even been "that person" and didn't
even realize it at the time. But the "Me sickness" is all around us and
in today's society, it seems to be a contagion that is spreading like
wild fire. For those who are a bit older, we can remember a day when
people would actually open the door for ladies and someone would offer to
help an elderly person across the street. Now days, it seems people
make excuses for not doing these thoughtful things, rationalizing that
they wouldn't appreciate it or "that person might think I'm trying to
rob them" or any number of unpleasant outcomes they have imagined could potentially happen if they offer to be nice. So instead, they keep
minding their own business and go on their merry way thinking "no harm
done" and all is well. But is it?
Narcissism as a psychological definition is typically seen as self-involved attitudes and behavior where there is little or no empathy for others. This pattern of behavior is the result of Narcissistic wounding by people who are insecure, abusive, addictive or have narcissistic patterns
themselves. Once
the wounding has happened, their defenses remain lurking in the
unconscious mind ready to be called into action at any resemblance of
threat. So how can being courteous and kind to others be perceived as a threat? Because there is a potential for rejection
or judgment that this individual is not emotionally strong enough to handle.
How many times have we seen a friend get blamed for something they didn't do? Aside from the usual childhood experiences where Johnny hits Alicia from behind then blames it on Ricky when Alicia turns around to find out who did it, as adults we have seen this happen on a much more serious level. Cases where someone was simply trying to assist a woman and before her powers of reason can kick in, she calls out for help assuming he is there to hurt her. This can also be seen in the smaller things such as opening the door for a stranger and they don't even acknowledge that you were there, much less the one who held the door open for them. Over time, one could begin to wonder why they are so nice to others when they don't appreciate it. And what about that "friend" who is always helping their friends in trouble, only to later be complaining about how they got walked over and taken advantage of?
Narcissism as a psychological definition is typically seen as self-involved attitudes and behavior where there is little or no empathy for others. This pattern of behavior is the result of Narcissistic wounding by people who are insecure, abusive, addictive or have narcissistic patterns
themselves. Once
the wounding has happened, their defenses remain lurking in the
unconscious mind ready to be called into action at any resemblance of
threat. So how can being courteous and kind to others be perceived as a threat? Because there is a potential for rejection or judgment that this individual is not emotionally strong enough to handle.How many times have we seen a friend get blamed for something they didn't do? Aside from the usual childhood experiences where Johnny hits Alicia from behind then blames it on Ricky when Alicia turns around to find out who did it, as adults we have seen this happen on a much more serious level. Cases where someone was simply trying to assist a woman and before her powers of reason can kick in, she calls out for help assuming he is there to hurt her. This can also be seen in the smaller things such as opening the door for a stranger and they don't even acknowledge that you were there, much less the one who held the door open for them. Over time, one could begin to wonder why they are so nice to others when they don't appreciate it. And what about that "friend" who is always helping their friends in trouble, only to later be complaining about how they got walked over and taken advantage of?
These are the experiences that can wound the compassionate centers of a soul and lead to a more selfish view, sometimes manifesting in narcissistic thinking
. As an individual and a free thinker
, we choose how we process these experiences in life. When something negative happens we choose whether to be hurt a lot, or to only be hurt a little and let it roll off our back. And I'm not talking about those who on the outside act like nothing is wrong and then go on mumbling for a few days about the experience. In fact, those are the individuals I am hoping this article will reach, because that deeper wounding you harbor inside of you will continue to fester and find a permanent place in your soul which can lead to a skewed perception of life and others around you, even causing you to pull away from being social at all.
. As an individual and a free thinker, we choose how we process these experiences in life. When something negative happens we choose whether to be hurt a lot, or to only be hurt a little and let it roll off our back. And I'm not talking about those who on the outside act like nothing is wrong and then go on mumbling for a few days about the experience. In fact, those are the individuals I am hoping this article will reach, because that deeper wounding you harbor inside of you will continue to fester and find a permanent place in your soul which can lead to a skewed perception of life and others around you, even causing you to pull away from being social at all.
So how do we combat this in our own personal lives to ensure that we don't fall victim to this narrow minded approach to life? It's simple...
Keep giving
! Compassion
is the key to unlocking that ugly door of pain and it helps us to open
our hearts to the things we have blocked out. Some may need therapy, so
don't think this is going to be one of the blanket "one size fit's all"
answers for everyone, because each person is different in their needs.
But no matter your unique situation or needs, there is one thing we can
all do to help the situation and retrain our minds to think
differently, and that is to reach out and give. The Gift of Thoughtfulness can open our hearts and our minds and help us to in turn be more kind to ourselves.Free Mind Development Courses
Selfishness and Narcissism in Family Relationships
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